Monday, November 28, 2005

Diva or Princess?

I love being massaged. It's one of the four things I require to live a life of comfort:

--Eat
--Sleep
--Massages
--Talk to me

This morning I meowed as shrilly and loudly as I could until I got someone's attention. The reward was a nice long massage. Unfortunately, I ended up getting static from it, but it was definitely worth it.

Mom says I'm a princess, but this other human she talks to a lot (she really cuts into my massage time), Faythe, says I'm a diva. What's the difference anyway? Does it really matter as long as I get attention, plenty of choice food and the #1 Sleeping Spot in the house?

Listen, I am a beautiful, shiney, nubian feline of the female persuasion. I demand respect. And I demand attention. Now I have to admit, I'm scared of a lot of things. A knock at the door. A shoe that suddenly appears where it wasn't yesterday. A plastic bag that makes noise. Or a foot that touches me when I walk by. Yes it's true, I have fragile, sensitive nerves that react with a limber if not taut spring into the air. Simba even called me a "Scaredy Cat" once! Mom thinks it may have something to do with having a feral momma for the first month of my life or being abandoned by a cruel human in a city alley at the tenderest of years. The background of my infancy is still a mystery to everyone so we really don't know why I am a delicate and nervous kitty.

All I know is if I have approved of you, after coming out of hiding of course, and have decided to grace you with my presence, I expect attention. And a lot of it. Just don't make any sudden moves.

I may have to resort to the loud bitchy meow again after the static wears off. I need another massage after all this typing.

1 comment:

HanktheDog said...

Hi Zoe, The word diva comes from divine. This is a long-standing tribute, dating back to ancient Egypt where cats were sometimes worshipped. The Egyptian royalty, of course, was also deified, so maybe princess and diva aren't so far removed. Either way, being a little high strung is a well-known perogative. So, don't change a thing. Bask in your regality and take any seat in the house you deign to.